Hi! My name is Dawn Davidson, of LoveOutsideTheBox.com. I’m here to help polyamorous people and other relationship explorers to better connect to themselves and those they love, even if they’re feeling lost, alone, or like there’s something wrong with them for who and how they love.
Today I’m writing you a love letter of sorts. It’s a love letter from my heart, to your heart, and the hearts of everyone you love.
I’m here today to tell you that love is OK.
“What?” I can hear some of you saying, “Just OK? Isn’t it better than that?”
Well, yes, of course, love is also wonderful, amazing, “all you need” and “what makes the world go ’round.” I’m not disputing that!
Mostly though, what I’m here to say is that love is always OK. No matter who and how many you love, no matter their gender, their body shape or size, their race or the color of their skin, their political affiliation, their talents and abilities, their spiritual or religious leanings, their education…
Love is ALWAYS OK.
All the rest? Honestly, those are just the details, the how and the why of your particular love.
Now, if you’re looking for help in those details — maybe around communication skills, or jealousy; maybe you need help making some Agreements, or you want to talk about how to talk about your new boyfriend to your existing girlfriend, or try to explain to your friend why you’d like to bring +2 instead of +1 to their next party — whatever those details, if you want help, I’m happy to listen. Once I’ve helped you figure out what your particular needs are, then I can offer you some coaching, some tools and resources, or point you in the direction of others who can help more. Whether you take me up on any of those offers is totally up to you, and we can talk about it in one of my free 1/2 hour consultations if that’s what you want.
But it’s not what I’m really here about today. Today I’m here to talk about the fact that Love is always OK. I’m guessing that if you’re alive and reading this now, that it’s a good bet that at some point in your life someone, somewhere, told you that there was something wrong about your love. Maybe you’ve been shamed for who and how you love, or told that it’s not ok to love more than one person at a time. Maybe someone else wants to put limits on your heart. Maybe that someone is YOU! We’re often hardest on those closest to us… and that applies especially to ourselves in many cases. But whatever the reason, and whomever is speaking those words to you, I’m here to tell you that they’re wrong. Love is always ok.
Now don’t get me wrong. Sometimes it’s important to put limits on our behavior, or to moderate how we express those feelings. It isn’t ok to express love in a sexual way to someone for whom that would be toxic or damaging, for instance. Nor is it ok to break existing Agreements (with your partner/s or yourself) just because you felt a chemical head rush in the heat of the moment. But there isn’t anything wrong with feeling love itself. That’s always ok.
Love is an amazing thing. It can be a wild tempestuous journey, or a sweet, quiet smile between friends. It can make us feel the best and the worst that we ever feel in our lives. Love is often a teacher. Sometimes it’s a spiritual journey… or a crucible of change. We often don’t choose who and how we love, even though we can choose how and when to express that. But no matter what makes your love special, no matter how long or short that love is, no matter who and how many you love…
Love is always OK. And so are YOU.
Thank you for sharing this moment with me today… this moment of love, and unconditional acceptance. Thank you for allowing me to share my heart with you, and for receiving my love. If you want to talk more with me about any of this, or if you’re interested in setting up a consultation session with me for any reason, you can fill out my contact form, and let me know how I can help you today. Whoever you love, whatever forms that might take, or however many people you might love …
Love is OK.
And so are you. 🙂
May you always love boldly, safely, and well,
PS: Want to talk more about this? I’m happy to listen! I offer coaching and counseling via phone, Skype, Google-hangout, or in person in the SF Bay Area. Drop me a note, and we’ll set up a time to talk, ok? OK!
∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥ ∞ ♥
[© 2012 Dawn M. Davidson]