Poly Hate Speech?

This video came across my virtual desktop today:

The person who brought it to my attention called it “hate speech,”  and another poster from that same PLN list agreed, saying:

… imagine viewing it as someone who is sexually conservative (but perhaps still kind of hip, so would still watch it) and who thinks poly is something that dirty diseased slutty women do.  It’s a very different video from that angle.

Matthew Bobbu in the same community disagreed: http://polytical.org/2012/05/sex-censorship-rock-roll/

He said (among other things!)

…“yeah, there are some poly people out there who do bad things – just like there are in every group. They are not representative of poly people at large, and we try our best to deal with them as a community.” Open discussion and debate is the only way we can deal with negative presentation or criticism, and the only way we can hope to change minds.


What do YOU think?  Is this the sort of thing we just need to tolerate as part of polyamory becoming more widely known?  Or is it pernicious, and something we as a community should address?  If so, how?

As always, feel free to comment here, or in my Facebook, LoveOTB. 🙂

~♥ Dawn

PS:  It’s still not too late to hear Sam & Wes’s FREE intro teleseminar for their Write Right Now training. The course hasn’t started yet, so you might want to hop over and sign up for the on-demand recording.  If you want to sign up for the whole course, it’ll cost money (and I’ll get a bonus, as one of Sam’s Really Big Fans 🙂 but honestly, I got so much great info out of just the free teleseminar, I think it’s worth your time to take a listen: http://bit.ly/JHTwNt. And besides which, she mentioned me on today’s free call. How awesome is that??

PPS: Remember, if you want to discuss this, or other issues related to polyamory and open relationships with someone who’s been doing this stuff for a while, then feel free to contact me to set up a time for a free intro session!



©2012, Dawn M. Davidson

3 thoughts on “Poly Hate Speech?

  1. chegumby

    As a person who has been in poly relationships but is not self identified as a part of the larger poly community, I find this to be very funny – and besides, everything I look at is “male gayzed”

    thank god for punk rock folk bands

  2. cyan_blue

    It’s not the loveliest video, that’s for sure. But what annoyed me most was the fake-lesbianism among the women… tongues not quite touching, etc.

    1. Uncharted Love Post author

      Yeah, I agree. Clearly exploitative, for “the male gaze” etc. It’s a pretty annoying song to have associated with poly. But as others have said, I think it’s mostly just another “love sux!” video with the twist that this time, it’s not monogamous.

      Maybe if we play it backwards everyone will get their dignity back?? 😉


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